Wok Like A Zombie

FOWYGET? (Friend of Were You Gonna Eat That?) Hilary is OBSESSED with everything Asian - mostly Asian men, but also Asian food sometimes. She taught us how to make this INCREDIBLE, super spicy stir fry that may actually be eating my stomach lining, but is totally wonderful.



INGREDIENTS:
- olive oil
- 1/2 clove garlic, chopped
- chilis
- one block extra firm tofu, cubed
- broccoli, cut into bite-size pieces
- baby bok choy, slightly steamed
- 2 ripe tomatoes, diced
- 1/2 package white mushrooms, sliced
- rice vinegar
-apple cider vinegar
- soy sauce

Hila taught me how to make this first as a sauce for vegetables, and then we turned it into a stir fry - so this is largely improv. We started out by frying the tofu in olive oil with a little garlic and a few crushed chilis, so it would be firmer on the sides and also spicy and delicious. Hilary is very patient and i am not.


When the little cubes were brown on the sides and lookin' fine, Hila put them in a separate bowl so they could sit and wait for the glorious bed of vegetables that awaited! We started up another pan with olive oil, generous chopped garlic and what Hilary helpfully describes as "enough" chilis. Then we added mushrooms and the pulp from the tomatoes. Those cooked until they smelled so good we just about died.

Um, that keeps posting sideways. Not sure why. Okay! Hila steamed the bok choy just a little bit to soften it up, while I added the broccoli. When both of these things were starting to soften, we combined them with the diced tomato and finally the tofu.


The next part is critical! Sprinkle the stir fry with a light coating of rice vinegar, followed by a splash of apple vinegar. Let that simmer for a bit, and then when you're absolutely sure everything is almost done cooking, add a generous helping of soy sauce. This will change the chemical composition of what's happening, so you have to take the stir fry off the heat shortly thereafter - I don't know; it's science. Do what the nice lady tells you. The resulting sauce will be SPICY AS FUCK, but amazing.

Enjoy over brown rice! I am about to go make some right now.

Tasty Curry of Undetermined Ethnic Origin

elena's roommate annie gave me this recipe for thai curry out of a book. i tried making it with tofu and it didn't go so well, so the next time i tried seitan and it was perfect. i also tried adding okra, which i've never had in thai food ever, but the sliminess of the okra held the curry together pretty well. then i got carried away adding other vegetables. t.i. says you can add whatever you like!


INGREDIENTS:
- 1 package seitan (i used westsoy vegetarian stir fry strips)
- 2-5 dried chili peppers, chopped (i used mexican instead of thai - whatever)
- extra virgin olive oil
- 1 jar green thai curry paste (thai kitchen - for some reason all the other kinds of curry paste have shrimp or fish in them)
- 3-5 cloves garlic, minced
- 2 tsp grated ginger
- 1 onion, chopped
- 2 medium potatoes, cubed
- 2 carrots, chopped
- 1 red pepper, chopped
- 4-5 white mushrooms, chopped
- 1 pkg okra, chopped (i think like 20 pieces?)
- salt
- 1 can coconut milk
- cinnamon
- fresh coriander, chopped

the first thing you'll probs want to do is chop up all the vegetables, to save time later. i made the mistake of putting them all together in a bowl, which was annoying as i later learned they required different cooking times, but boy did they look pretty:


heat up some oil in a wok, add the crumbled-up chilis and then the seitan. the more chilis you add, the spicier your curry will be. fry to your preference, then remove it from heat and set aside.

in a large saucepan, add more oil and fry the garlic and the ginger for two minutes. we learned that if you keep your ginger in the freezer, it's a lot easier to grate.

add the onion and a dash of cinnamon (to taste).

then add curry paste and a few (maybe 3-4) full jars of water. bring it to a boil. you'll want it to be enough water to cover your curry, so you may need more or less water depending on how much stuff you're throwing in there.

add your potatoes, carrots, coconut milk and seitan. bring it back to a boil, and then reduce the heat, add okra, mushrooms and red pepper and simmer for 20-40 minutes (enough time for the carrots and potatoes to get tender). before eating, sprinkle in the slightest bit of salt and a dash of coriander.


oh man, delicious. eat it over brown rice! OM NOM NOM NOM.

and yes that is king tut on my water glass.